Is the idea of marriage too outdated for the 21st century?

Never think it! Very, very, very few things are as beautiful as marriage, and I can see this even as an outsider. Marriage is the very consummation of what man and woman are, and to try to remove the events and emotions (such as sex, ultimate trust, being part of a mutual [and often sacrificial] partnership, etc.) of marriage to an outside camp is to cheapen it drastically.

For another thing, children are never as healthy as when they have a caring family around them (i'm primarily thinking mental health here). Not that any family is perfect, nor any marriage, for that matter. But the beauty makes it worth it. Always.

   

I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too!

I've officially sold out...

...and gotten a facebook. I suppose...i mean, yeah, i will...still check this and write occasionally on here, but's true that it's a lot easier to stay connected on facebook.

whatever. it's not a big deal.

Currently Listening Let Love In By The Goo Goo Dolls Let Love In see related

There And Back Again...

  Well, this is the massive post that covers everything that happened in the last three weeks--namely, going to Turkey. First I will just say it rocked. It was tons of fun seeing people and places and doing old things. This post will have tons of pictures.

So, let's begin at the beginning. On July 26th, Thursday afternoon we headed off to the airport with three big bags and one carryon. We checked in, we got on the plane, and flew off to Detroit. Our route was: Indianapolis (IND) to Detroit (DET), DET to Brussels (BRU), BRU to Ankara (ESB). I like airport codes. anyway.

We were about to land in Detroit when the pilot guns the engines and lifts back off. We assumed at first that he was just going to circle around and try again, but then we find out that lo and behold, in case we hadn't noticed (we had), it was storming outside. Hence the weather was bad, windshear and stuff, and the weather wasn't suitable for landing at that time. But there were 30 other planes circling waiting to land, and we didn't have enough fuel to wait around that long, so instead we get flown off to Saginaw, Michigan, which is some hole in the wall I hadn't even heard of. It's about a 100 miles from Detroit.

So when we land the pilot informs us that since he put his engines at full throttle when he lifted back off in Detroit, FAA regulations required that the engines be inspected before it could fly again, so in short that plane wasn't going anywhere that night.

SO we got off the plane and into this tiny airport with 4 gates. They gave us an 800 number to call about our flights. So we call, get put on hold for a half an hour, work something out. They put us on a busride back to Detroit, which takes two hours, and by the time we're there, we have of course missed our flight to Bruxelles. That's fine, since the people on the phone put us on a flight to Paris (CDG) and then to Istanbul (IST), and then hopefully maybe to ESB. We were flying with Northwest, by the way. In DET we get incompetant staff and tons of idiotic mixups with our tickets, and we literally run to reach the plane, which we made during last call. WAY TOO CLOSE. I do not really like Northwest.

In Paris we go to the Air France counter and get EXCELLENT service, which was a nice change, and then we go and wait in the very crumby Charles De Gaulle airport. Yes, they have an excuse, they are building a massive new terminal or two, but it was old and crowded and kinda dirty and a mess. So we waited, and then we got on the Air France flight to Istanbul. Air France was the stellar opposite to Northwest: excellent service, excellent experience overall. Of course they put us in business class, so that sweetened the flight.

In Istanbul we didn't have too much trouble, and we got a flight to Ankara without much hassle. We got on the flight, no hassle there, we arrived in Ankara at the absolutely GORGEOUS new Esenboğa airport. Here's where the pictures start: 

I have to confess that I didn't take those pictures myself, but I wanted to showcase this beautiful building on account of the old building being such a dump.

So at the airport we were picked up by the husband of one of our best Turkish friends, and we went back and stayed with the parents of said best Turkish friend, who are also great friends of ours (we know that whole extended family very well--father, mother, three daughters, two married with 1 kid each, one engaged). So that night--we arrived Friday night at about 10pm or so, surprisingly only two hours later than we were supposed to arrive.

So we went back to our friends' house, talked for perhaps a half hour and then crashed after being up for 30+ hours. We spent the next day with them, first just hanging out around their place, then going to a new mall out in Batıkent (where they live) and hanging out there. that included some bowling and lahmacun, which was great. That afternoon we went up to Çiğdem and got the keys to the Porterfields' apartment from Troy Lundy--it was great to see him again--and then we pretty much did nothing for the rest of the evening.

What we did do is Joseph and I walked over to the Lundys. I was about to jump over the perimeter fence of Park Sitesi. The ground beneath me was really cracked and dry--like with cracks an inch wide. I thought it was going to be really hard and dry like it should be. Wrong. It was mud about half a foot deep, and I pretty much ruined those shoes. I let them dry overnight and scraped as much mud off as I could, but they are definately tennis shoes now, not my every day shoes. I'm going to go buy new shoes today. woohoo!

Next morning we went to IPCA for church, and it was absolutely wonderful to be there again. It was a really great reminder to hear people singing so passionately with only a piano for background--reminding me that worship is never about music; and the music should be about the worship, whether it's one piano or guitar or whether it's a full band with an orchestra and a 300 member choir. 

After church we went and ate at Hacı Arif Bey with the Hoards, which was heavenly. We were there for nearly two and a half hours before we headed back to Çiğdem and I...can't...quite...remember what happened that afternoon.

Next morning Joseph and I met with Andy Hemingway. We went and talked to Troy about the possibility of a game of Axis and Allies or possibly Battlefield 2 at the internet café. We left him to his work and the three of us went and played Battlefield 2 and a little Counterstrike, and then we split up and Andy went home. That afternoon involved a couple games of euchre, then nothing again, then supper.

After supper Mr. & Mrs. Wiest came over to visit, but Joseph and I headed out again to meet with Andy and Sam Hemingway at the internet café. Unfortunately Troy had a family crisis come up and he couldn't join us, but we had a blast playing about even amounts of Battlefield 2 and Counterstrike again. We were there for three hours before heading home.

Next morning, Tuesday, we gezzed downtown with Heybet. Gez might not be the right word, since we didn't have enought time to properly gez (for those Americans who have no idea what i'm talking about, 'gez' is a turkish word that is roughly comperable to the phrase 'window shopping,' though that falls far short. First, when one is gezzing it is completely normal to actually buy something, unlike window shopping, and furthermore gezzing implies and is comprised of doing it with someone, thus forming a social experience as well as being a lax shopping stroll. It's really undefinable and one has to experience the culture to fully understand it.). So we walked up through Kızılay and up to Hoca Tepe:

I did take that picture. (It looks dark in the picture, it was really a pretty bright day). Anyway, we went into the Beğendik underneath and bought german berliners (jelly doughnuts) which, as usually, were absolutely divine. I don't know why they haven't caught on in America yet. They're so much better--not so dang sugarly overpowering, but still lovely and sweet and SO YUMMY!

Moving on. After gezzing we rushed back to Çiğdem, grabbed the bag with Joseph and my stuff, and went to A.Ş.T.İ. to catch a bus. The parents stayed in Ankara while Joseph and I headed down to Cappadocia early. (This was Tuesday, remember.) We arrived in Nevşehir at around five, took two buses to Avanos, and were met by the Matt and Michael Vesey at the dürak there.

And so our stay in Cappadocia started. We were there for a week, so I won't give a day-by-day account of events there. We: played a lot of poker, euchre, and hearts. We played a game of Axis and Allies (Matt and I won as the Axis. Fun.), and we played a game of Rail Baron (a game I had never played before but which was a lot of fun. I won kinda barely, Matt was pretty close behind me.)

We played a lot of Counterstrike at an internet café; we played Starcraft via LAN network at their house; we played EV Nova (separately, there's no multiplayer on that. I proceeded to buy the game the night we got back here.)

We watched "I, Robot," "Matrix," "Sahara," and "Entrapment." I strongly endorse all of those movies. We also watched a lot of a show called "Bananas," which features a lot of well-known stand-up comedians. Absolutely hilarious.

I played guitar (go figure).

On August 9th (last Thursday) we got up and a quarter to 4 AM and drove to Kayseri. Everyone else in Cappadocia (the Nakazawas, the Mosses) was going to France for a conference, and their flight left at seven. The Veseys had left the day before. So we waited around until about ten, then we boarded our flight and at 11:17 took off for Istanbul.

We were met by Paul Weaver, and we went back to his house for lunch with his wife and son. We spent the afternoon with them...

and then we headed off to the house of some other friends. Mahmut B., the father of the family, is a retired Colonel in the Turkish military. His wife is also retired. They have three gorgeous daughters who are all doctors: Tuğba, who is a child specialist, Esra and Ebru, who are doing their residencies to become radiologists and opthomologists, respectively.

Interesting political conversation arose that night. Mahmut was in the military, so of course his political views are extremely secular. Turkey just recently held elections for the position of Prime Minister, which was swept away by Recep Tayyip Erdoğan for the second time. His party (AK Partesi, or the People's Party) has thrown Turkey into an economic boom, which is probably the primary reason for his popularity, but the party has also shown some Islamic tendencies. Nothing overt, but there are those who worry. I don't particularly worry, but i don't discredit what i've heard, either.

What happened is that a few months ago Erdoğan appointed a new president (Gül) who is known to be a very devout Muslim. Many people were alarmed by this, and there was a protest in downtown Istanbul that more than a million people participated in. The military subtly sent across hints that the millitary wouldn't appreciate this perceived violation of Turkey's secularism, and that a coup might be possible.

The only way out of this kind of deadlock was to hold another election. It was a cop-out, but the best way to avoid tension and conflict or a coup.

So now that you have the background, Mahmut said something interesting that night. Best I can remember he said, "We genuinely don't want to interfere in Turkish politics. We're soldiers, we don't like being involved in politics." I'm not sure if he was just defending the military's actions or whether he really meant it, but it was a take i hadn't heard before.

Turkish politics are interesting. (grin) My apologies to those who do not find them interesting.

Fabulous night.

So here it is, the long-awaited (at least by me) Top 10 Movies and my Oscars! This took quite a lot of time and thought, as well as space (obviously).

My assessments of the following movies are based solely on the movie as a movie. If the movie was a book first, I’ll evaluate the book separately. I have taken the movies as single pieces of artwork to stand as their own. In the same way (farther below) I rank or judge actors or actresses on their art—how well they play the role and get across emotion and depth—not on their personal lives or the movies they’re in.

I’ll have to explain one thing first. For a long time I’ve experienced a certain feeling—an intense longing and a yearning, a bittersweetness, an awe, and simply a sense of being broken by something so heartrendingly beautiful. Some movies often inspire this feeling in me, and most often it’s conveyed to me in music. But I could never identify it, this feeling, so I simply called it the Vortex of Music.

I called it that because it felt so powerful and passionate and all-encompassing, and I called it that because it inspired awe. But I also called it that because at the center of the storm, all is calmness. It was the place where tears fell and were caught in a bottle, and where the whispers of thunder said to me, “Child, be at peace. You are Mine forever, and I am yours. I love you.”

And it was only this past year that I finally discovered what this feeling actually was. I’m not sure how it came to me, but at long last I realized that the Vortex of Music was my longing for Heaven. It was—is—the ultimate yearning to be with my God, to know the peace that passes all understanding. It’s the longing to be in a place where there’s no more pain, no more tears except in awe and beauty and joy. The yearning to be in the place where everything is finally as it should be.

The films below (except for #10) are all movies that inspired in me that longing, who touched in my heart a bit of that longing and gave the barest taste of Heaven.

THE TOP TEN

1). The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

            —Utterly, fantastically beautiful story. Samwise Gamgee is, in my opinion,

actually the hero—how he sacrifices so much and never, ever gives up on Frodo

or stops supporting him. Sam is what a friend should be.

—The ending is so gorgeous. I want so badly to follow Frodo, to go to the Grey

Havens, but my work here is not yet done.

—Amazing soundtrack

—Astounding acting

—Visually stunning

—Favorite quote(s):

“No more despair.” –this because it simply gives hope. There’s always hope.

“I’m glad to be with you, Samwise Gamgee, here at the end of all things.” –this because it just illustrates once again the Sam’s beautiful gift of friendship to Frodo.

“Well, I’m back.” –and this because it states that yes, I do want to go the Grey Havens, my heart was broken and is breaking, but Life goes on, and I must live it.

2). Chariots of Fire

            —Incredible contrast of man with God and man without. Selflessness vs.

selfishness. Eric Liddell poses as a role model for me in professional excellence

for the glory of God.

—Unbelievable acting

—Marvelous soundtrack

—Incomparable cinematography. (by the way, I’m not just using ‘incomparable

because I was looking for another adjective. It really is incomparable to anything

else I’ve seen. Runner-up purely on a cinematography level would be “The New

World.”)

—Favorite Quotes:

“Run in God’s name, and let the world stand back in wonder.”

“Jenny, I believe God made me for purpose. For China. But he also made me fast.      

And when I run, I feel His pleasure.”

3). Little Women (Newer Version)

            —Heartrendingly beautiful story. So real, so true, so bittersweet as Life really is,

but ultimately beautiful.

—Wonderful acting

—Awesome soundtrack

—Great cinematography

­—Favorite Quotes:

Don’t really have any. This movie is more about moments than about lines. I

actually feel that way about a lot of these movies.

4). Castaway

            —I know some people thought it was boring, unrealistic, blah blah blah.

                        I thought it was beautiful.

            Because, you see, the movie wasn’t really about the island. And I don’t think the

title is even about being stranded on an island—you’ll notice it’s two words: Cast Away, rather than Castaway. I think it’s about his heart being stranded when he comes home and find that his love has married someone else. It’s like being emotionally destroyed. But as he said in the quote below…

—Great acting. I love Tom Hanks.

—Beautiful soundtrack when it finally arrives. I love the oboe so much.

—Favorite Quotes:

“And I know what I have to do now. I’ve gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow

the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?”

5). Star Wars Episode III: The Revenge of the Sith

—Excellently dark. Maybe that sounds weird, but a good dark movie is rare. Most of them are sadistic in some way, gross, horror-inspiring, etc. This really captures the story behind the darkness, makes it more human.

—Fairly good acting. Hayden Christensen was great, in my opinion—pouring out such raw emotion is not easy. And really, at times it’s supposed to be melodramatic because at times life is melodramatic. Sometimes we are over-the-top. Natalie Portman—ehhhh…it’s a good thing she didn’t have that much of a role. Ewan McGregor only wavered on a few points.

—Great soundtrack as usual. John Williams is the premiere guy in the field.

6). Newsies

—Great David & Goliath film. Very American in its defiance and standing up for one’s rights. Love the story.

—Amazing acting, every one—Christian Bale, Robert Duvall, Bill Pullman. Wow.

—Great music; it is most certainly my favorite musical. Singin’ in the Rain would have to be the runner-up in that field.

—Favorite Quotes:

the songs, especially ‘Santa Fe.’

7). The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

—I know I said I was going to judge movies based on them and not their relation to anything else, but I want to comment on one thing. Adamson and the writers changed the plot a little so that Peter and the others really wanted to get home more than they did in the book. In doing that they changed the focus of the film from redemption (of Edmund and of Narnia as a whole) to courage. That was the one thing I wasn’t completely happy with.

—Now that I’ve bashed that part of the movie, I’m going to go on to say it was an awesome movie. Great story, obviously, since they got it from Lewis, who got it (mostly) from what God did.

—Amazing soundtrack. A lot of percussion, which was kind of Copland-esque.

—Favorite Quotes:

“He’s not a tame lion.”

“The weeping girl,” “Yes, sir, Lucy. She’s upset.” “Hence the weeping.”

8). Mr. Holland’s Opus

—Absolutely gorgeous depiction of how much of an impact one person—one unimportant person—can have in the lives of so many people. I love love love love the ending.

—Great acting. Richard Dreyfuss was amazing.

—Love the soundtrack, although most of all I love the ‘American Symphony’ at the end.

9). The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

—The beginning of the beautiful journey. 

—The ending is amazing. Sam’s devotion and commitment to Frodo is for me the central theme of the story.

—Amazing soundtrack

—Astounding acting

—Visually stunning

—Favorite Quotes:

“So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. What you have to do is decide what to do with the time that is given to you.”

“A wizard is never late, Frodo Baggins. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.”

10). Princess Bride

            —straight up hilarious. The best comedy/adventure ever made.

            —Favorite Quotes:

The whole movie. Just about every single line is quotable. But I guess I can single out a few ones that stand out:

—“We’ll never survive!” Response: “Nonsense. You’re only saying that because no one ever has.”

—“Inconceivable!”

—“The most famous is ‘never get involved in a land war in Asia.’ But only slightly less well-known is this: ‘never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!’” (laughs, thud)

—“Mawwage. Mawwage is what bwings us togever…today. Mawwage, that bwesséd awangement…that dweam wivin a dweam…”

—“Have you de wing?”

RUNNERS-UP (No particular order):

Batman Begins

Finding Neverland

At Worlds End (Pirates III)

Fiddler on the Roof

The Matrix

Master & Commander

RUNNERS-UP TO THE RUNNERS-UP (No particular order):

Cinderella Man

Pride & Prejudice (newer version)

Secondhand Lions

The Hunt for Red October

Signs

The Village

DESPERATELY WANT TO SEE:

Braveheart

Gladiator

V for Vendetta

MY OSCARS

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY:

1. Chariots of Fire
2. The New World
3. Mr. Holland’s Opus

BEST ACTORS:

1. Russell Crowe
2. Christian Bale
3. Tom Hanks

No particular order below; they’re all so great that I couldn’t rank them.

Robert Duvall

Christopher Plummer

Sean Connery

Ben Cross

Liam Neeson

Mel Gibson

Johnny Depp

Michael Caine

Wally Shawn

Bill Pullman

BEST ACTRESSES:

1. Julie Andrews
2. Katie Holmes
3. Helen Hunt
4. Meg Ryan
5. Keira Knightley
6. Sandra Bullock
7. Angelica Huston

BEST INANIMATE ACTOR:

1. Wilson the Volleyball

BEST SCREENPLAY:

1. Chariots of Fire
2. Little Women (Newer Version; same as above)
3. Mr. Holland’s Opus
4. Cinderella Man

BEST DESIGN (OVERALL):

1. The Lord of the Rings (all three parts)
2. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

BEST MUSICAL SCORE: this one is really, really hard…

1. LOTR Trilogy (The Lord of the Rings, the book, is not a trilogy, but the movies are. “The Lord of the Rings is often erroneously called a trilogy, when it is in fact a single novel, consisting of six books plus appendices, sometimes published in three volumes.” —from Note on the Text in Lord of the Rings)
2. Little Women
3. Newsies
4. Mr. Holland’s Opus
5. Castaway
6. The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe
7. Fiddler on the Roof

BEST EXTRA FEATURES (I made up this category, obviously):

1. Hands-down Lord of the Rings (all three parts, yet again) Can’t beat six dvds of the stuff, with twelve total commentaries (I’ve watched nine of them), and more.
2. STAR WARS (all of them)
3. The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

BEST DIRECTORS:

1. Steven Spielburg
2. M. Night Shyamalan
3. George Lucas

BEST ANIMATED FILM:

1. The Incredibles
2. The Triplets of Belville
3. Finding Nemo
4. Robin Hood
5. Aladdin

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